The Power of Pause: How Slowing Down Can Transform Your Relationships

Have you ever hit send on a text and immediately regretted it? You knew better, but somehow, the words still came out. And just like that, the real catastrophe begins.

Something I teach my clients—and practice in my own relationship—is the power of pause. It’s an absolute game-changer. I’ve literally caught myself mid-text, only to stop, reread, and realize… nope, that’s not the route I want to go down. That split second of awareness? It can change everything.

One of my favorite quotes by Viktor Frankl captures this beautifully:

"Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom."

How Pausing Helps

• In Communication: Instead of reacting impulsively, pausing lets you respond thoughtfully. (Example: A partner says something triggering—pausing helps you check in before reacting defensively.)

• In Decision-Making: Taking a moment before saying yes helps set boundaries and avoid resentment.

• In Conflict: A pause creates space for repair instead of escalation. (Example: Saying, “I need a moment to think before responding.”)

How to Practice the Power of Pause

Building this skill in small, low-stress moments makes it easier to access in high-stakes situations. Try these:

• Pause before making a decision. When a friend invites you out, take a breath, check in with yourself, and ask: Do I actually want to go and what do I already have going on?

• Give yourself space by asking a question. Instead of rushing to answer, gather a little more information:

  • What restaurant were you thinking?

  • When do you need me to get back to you?

  • Can you help me understand what you meant? (Great for partners!)

• Practice awareness. Next time you feel a strong emotion, take a breath, observe it, and name it before acting on it.

Where Could a Pause Create More Ease, Clarity, or Connection in Your Life?

If slowing down feels hard, you're not alone. I help people create more space for themselves—to respond instead of react, to set boundaries without guilt, and to make decisions with confidence.

Let’s talk. Schedule a consult to see how we can work together.