Premarital Therapy

with Emily Fiedtkou, LMFT

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“Lifelong partnership is built on more than just chemistry. It’s communication, trust, and growing alongside each other.”

If you’ve been together awhile and have unresolved patterns from early in the relationship, or you’re preparing to merge lives in a deeper way, this work can really make the difference between drifting apart and growing together.

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Couples Come to Me For Aligning On

  • Values or future goals

  • Handling conflict better

  • Older, unresolved issues

  • Mismatched expectations or uncertainty

  • Physical intimacy or emotional connection differences

  • Navigating adjustments to living together 

  • Preparing for deeper commitment

How Premarital Therapy With Me Works

I use a solution‑oriented, relational style rooted largely in Gottman Couples Therapy. We assess where you are, what works, what doesn’t, and build practical ways forward.

  • We explore your strengths so you can lean into what’s already working. We begin by identifying what’s going well in your relationship—communication wins, shared values, and the ways you naturally support each other. These strengths become your foundation.

  • We examine communication patterns, family histories, and how early relationship expectations still echo. We explore how past experiences, early relationship dynamics, and family influences may be shaping your current patterns, especially when conversations get hard.

  • We work together on values alignment, conflict resolution, boundary setting, and what roles or responsibilities feel fair. From how you handle conflict to how you divide responsibilities, we work through what feels unclear or uneven so your relationship can feel fair, supportive, and collaborative.

  • Sessions may run for 3–6 months, giving you time to practice, adjust, and deepen connection. Most premarital clients work with me on a weekly basis for 3 to 6 months. That gives you space to learn, test, adjust, and grow without rushing the process or forcing perfect answers.

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  • They feel more clarity on what they both want long‑term

  • Conflict feels more productive; fights don’t spiral

  • The day to day activities feel fun again

  • They’re more aligned around values, goals, and future direction

  • They feel confident about decisions tied to living together, shared finances, or family expectations

After Premarital Therapy With Me,
Couples Say:

Let's Talk

About Me

Hi, I’m Emily Fiedtkou.

I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who brings realness and purpose to premarital work. I have been married since 2023 (after moving in with each other after 2 months), and learned what it means personally to blend lives, different backgrounds, and families. I see what it takes—and what often gets missed.

I believe premarital therapy shouldn’t feel cookie-cutter or fluffy. It should feel like honest conversations, real tools, and greater confidence in what you’re building together. Outside of sessions, I love making tortillas from scratch for taco Tuesday, traveling with my husband, cuddling with our 3 dogs, or on the tennis court.

Availability: In-person in Santa Barbara and virtually throughout California

  • Masters in Counseling Psychology, Pacifica Graduate Institute

  • Bachelors in Psychology, UCSB

  • Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT #151943)

  • Gottman Couples Institute - Level 1 + 2 Certified couples therapist

  • Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy PESI Certificate

  • 40‑Hour DBT Therapist Onboarding training, Choices Counseling & Skills Center 

  • Training in DBT Skills, Mindfulness, Parts Work, Attachment Repair, & Trauma Integration

Education, Trainings, & Credentials

Schedule A Free Consultation

My typical rate for 60 minutes couples therapy sessions is $300. Since premarital counseling is shorter-term and solution focused, I’ve created two packages geared towards setting you up for success.

Packages & Pricing

  • This includes the Gottman relationship assessment prior to starting, one assessment session of your relationship and five sessions focused on equipping you with the key tools for a long-lasting and loving relationship. It is short, focused, and will address specific relationship challenges.  

    Full package cost: $1650

  • This includes the Gottman relationship assessment prior to starting, one assessment session of your relationship and nine sessions focused on diving into relationship dynamics, challenging patterns and aligning on the long-term vision.  

    Full package cost: $2750

Schedule A Free Consultation

Let’s talk through the big things now, so they don’t become roadblocks later.

Premarital therapy creates a strong foundation for a lifetime together.

Get Started in 4 Steps

  • Send a message or fill out the form. Use as much or as little information as feels right. I’ll get back to you within 1 business day.

  • A 15‑minute call so we can connect and see if we’re a good match.

  • We’ll map out what’s happening, what both of you want, and what feels most important to tackle first.

  • We’ll meet regularly to build movement toward the future + partnership you both want to live in.

Contact Me